What would you do to your lesbian gf's close-minded mom?

[manglalakbay09]

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i am in a same-*** relationship now. if i'd hear myself telling you this a year ago, i wouldn't have believed it since i never imagined myself to be in one. but... well... love happens and love wins man jud.

i was never close-minded with same *** relationships kay daghan kog friends na bayot og tomboy and di man ko ma awkwardan nila. basta lipay sila and free, happy ko para nila. now that i am in one, lisud man diay especially na ikaw, the world perceived you as straight and expecting you to find a prince or knight-in-shining armour soon. wala pa kaayo ko ni open ani sa akong friends kay lisud... all the more sa family. pero ako man gud, mas open akong parents... and daghan mi mag igsuon. di ra siguro magsakit ang dughan sa akong mama ug papa sa relationship that i have now. naa naman sila apo... ang usa minyo napud...

but my girlfriend's situation is lisud nga in a way affected ko. hard butch jud siya na lesbian. as in klaro kaayo ba. walay pag duha2. pero iyang mama di kadawat. unsaon ta man, only child. naabot sa point na ni message iyang mama nako telling me to stay away from her daughter. kung ingani, courteous and respectful ra man gihapon kog reply. wa man gihapon nawala akong maayong pamatasan kay naa man sad tay grado. human gud og college. pero naabot sa point na sakit na kaayo manulti iyang mama... kanang tawgon na kag mga di angay itawag ba. i still kept calm, respectful, and courteous... and i pointed out that the issue is between her and her daughter because she can't or won't accept that her daughter is lesbian... na bisan og mag buwag pa mi diha2 dayon, she can't deny the fact na with or without or relationship, tomboy jud iyang anak.

di man unta ko ganahan ipahibaw sa akong gf kay di ko ganahan og gubot. pero we promised to be honest with each other and to tell each other everything especially kay LDR mi, so i did... but i think telling her only made it worse.

nahilom iyang mama so far. mga mag usa ka buwan na since her last message (yes! mao ni pinakataas na "break" nako from her virtual lashings on FB Messenger!) pero makuyawan ko tingalig calm before the storm ra ba. ganahan ko mureach out sa iyang mama. kay pareho man mi og gusto para sa iyang anak... kanang magtinarong na and mahuman na og skwela... makahibaw mu-manage sa time ug money... etc. pero lahi jud ang tan-aw sa iyang mama nako. in her words pa, ako daw ang "nagtulak sa kanyang (aking) anak sa imoralidad".

and it's affecting our relationship... emotionally draining... ako pa jud ang klase sa babaye nga mu-stick jud sa akong head ang mga hurtful words sa mga tawo. ang nakalisud sad kay di sila magkasinabot sukad2 kay iyang mama OFW and nagdako siya nga wala iyang mama... wa na siyay papa 3 yrs old palang siya... sa laing tawo siya nagdako and she went through a lot (psychologically and emotionally in her upbringing) in her life.

mao ra ni akong nobela. i just really don't know what to do with her mom. since i am obliged to tell her when her mom suddenly "threatens" me, my family, and my profession, di sad siya maminaw nako na ayaw nalang i-confront imong mama kay ako jud mulabas nga daotan kay sumbongera na nuon kog dating. it's draining me.

[xxkatgorgeousxx]

Same og situation imu uyab and akong cousin sauna TS. Lesbian sad sya, only child and akong tita kay OFW. Dugay2x sad bag-o nadawat sa akong tita na tomboy akong cousin kay kana lage nangandoy pa og apo akong tita. Pero in the end nadawat ra man niya. I guess what her mom needs is time. And dapat sya ang mu-reach out sa iyang mom kay after all, silang duha ra bya gyud ang family ha. It's gonna be hard but she has to be patient. Ayaw nalang tubayi iyang mama if mu-message nimu sa messenger.

[slakker]

i-block iyang mom sa facebook ts...

[manglalakbay09]

Hi @xxkatgorgeousxx and @slakker...

Ana bitaw siya i-block nalang nako iyang mama. Sa uban nako na social media accounts na block na nako. Pero siguro ako ray buang nga wa nako siya gi block kay i was hoping we could meet a mutual understanding or hoping ba na things will be okay between us in the long run...

Nakahuna-huna jud ko ana pero siguro nag hope pa ko na ma ok. I told my gf na kausa nalang... one more harsh message from her mom and ako na jud i-block.

Before nag think pa ko na I want to meet her mom na magkastorya mi etc... but a few weeks back, I told her na I don't want to meet her mom anymore unless she says sorry to me or something.

Thanks guys! ����

[manglalakbay09]

Hi @marius...

Salamat.

Actually, I'm doing exactly what you said man. I still respect her Mom despite of... kay ingnon palang wa ko gipadako og tarong.

Ang naa nuon tendency magrebelde is akong uyab. Kay naa man sad gud siyay hinanakit sukad pagkabata pa... but I constantly remind her na dili mag tubag2 sa Mama and never raise her voice when talking to her Mom.

I will pray for her Mom nalang jud na ma open iyang mind and heart.

[<SMILE>]

Well a lot of relationship the normal male to female ones did not prosper, life's objectivities is always dependent in finding the exact partner who ought for the same life direction. In that regard the nature of the relation is important for the aim is for the improvement and betterment of life. Happiness and contentment are the main goal and life would be dismal if such are not achieved, people do aspire and try to reach the needed and of course going there of what they are and not of what they should be, it's hard to venture into the unknown and use it as leverage to succeed and along the way the grief of self denial would always emerge and try to hamper. I could say be what you both are and continue with your journey through life, use her mother not as an obstacle but a means to keep both of you stronger, but as a mother please do not forget to respect her so that in time she would learn to respect that mutual feelings you have for each other. Life is strange sometimes but it should go on and as human beings there are no other alternatives and recourse but to adapt for we could produce human beings, but in terms of perspective we do differ in terms of that quest for happiness.

[manglalakbay09]

Hello @<SMILE> wow. This is nice to hear from a mother. Yes, I still do respect her even when I reply, I always make sure that I sound respectful and courteous at the very least. Thank you.

[manglalakbay09]

Well a lot of relationship the normal male to female ones did not prosper, life's objectivities is always dependent in finding the exact partner who ought for the same life direction. In that regard the nature of the relation is important for the aim is for the improvement and betterment of life. Happiness and contentment are the main goal and life would be dismal if such are not achieved, people do aspire and try to reach the needed and of course going there of what they are and not of what they should be, it's hard to venture into the unknown and use it as leverage to succeed and along the way the grief of self denial would always emerge and try to hamper. I could say be what you both are and continue with your journey through life, use her mother not as an obstacle but a means to keep both of you stronger, but as a mother please do not forget to respect her so that in time she would learn to respect that mutual feelings you have for each other. Life is strange sometimes but it should go on and as human beings there are no other alternatives and recourse but to adapt for we could produce human beings, but in terms of perspective we do differ in terms of that quest for happiness.

Hello... wow. This is nice to hear from a mother. Yes, I still do respect her even when I reply, I always make sure that I sound respectful and courteous at the very least. Thank you.

[manglalakbay09]

maayo kay mao na imong gibuhat.


suggestion lang ni nako ha. since ikaw man ang openminded. show your gf a video on youtube of a baby suckling on the mom's breast or a baby learning how to walk. ipa remind cya na ing-ana cya ka hopeless sa una na gi-atiman sa iyang mama.

in the end mugawas ra gihapon pagka inahan sa iyang mama, if makita gyud niya na nag tinarong iyang anak. iya ra na ma accept ang pagka lesbian sa iyang anak.

Sige I will try. And I hope she would feel that way and it would have the same effect on her... kay... wa man sad gud niya na feel sa iyang mama. Gibilin ra siya under the care of her relatives sukad baby pa nya magkita ra sila kung makauli iyang mama. Bisan asa ra pud siya na paryente gi "pasa2" sa iyang mama until naka settle na jud sa iyang uncle pag 11 niya. Anyway, I will still try.

As for her Mom, nagtinarong man siya but ang pirmi jud mindset sa iyang mama na wala siya nagtarong. Okay man iyang grades ron and muuli ra man dayon sa balay after class. Pero madugay lang gani og uli mga 30 mins, muana dayon iyang mama na asa napud nag laag. Mao nang siya di nalang pud mustory o murason sa iyang mama kay di man siya tuohan. Haaay.

Wa naman koy labot ana noh kay ilaha man na. Affected lang ko and I'm caught in between a war I have no involvement on. Pagan ang sibilyan nuon.

[<SMILE>]

Hello... wow. This is nice to hear from a mother. Yes, I still do respect her even when I reply, I always make sure that I sound respectful and courteous at the very least. Thank you.

Your welcome,
in time she will learn to accept the truth and would soon bound to respect it,
just persevere in treating her above all things as a caring faithful mother who always oversee fruitful future for her beloved daughter,
place the relation in that equation and both of you will eventually obtain her nod.