Answering Machines

[catnip23]

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jok.... jokkkk... jok

Actual Answering machines answers recorded and verified by the world's
famous international institute of answering machine answers.

1. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now,
but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll
get back to you as soon as we're finished.

2. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those
reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a
message.

3. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company,
I already sent the money. If you are my parents,
please send money. If you are my financial aid
institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If
you are my friends,you owe me money. If you are a
female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.

4. Hi. Now YOU say something.

5. Hi, I'm not home right now, but my answering
machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait
for the beep.

6. Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are
you?

7. Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you
! soon. If you leave a "sexy" message, I'll
call sooner!

8. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is
his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and
I'll stick your message to myself with one of
these magnets.

9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable
of receiving messages. My owners do not need
siding, windows or a hot tub, and their carpets
are clean. They give to charity through their
office and do not need their picture taken. If
you're still with me, leave your name and number
and they will get back to you. :mrgreen:

10. This is not an answering machine-this is a
telepathic thought-recording device. After the
tone,think about your name, your number and your
reason for calling, and I'll think about
returning your call.

11. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding
someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if
I don't call back, it's you!!!!

12. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer
the phone right now. Leave a message and then
wait by your phone until I call you back.

13. If you are a burglar, then we're probably at
home cleaning our weapons right now and can't
come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't
home and it's safe to leave a message.

14. Please leave a message. However, you have the
right to remain silent. Everything you say will
be recorded and will be used by us.

15. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't
pick up the phone right now, because we're doing
something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing
it up and down, and I like doing it left to
right... real slowly. So leave a message, and
when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get
back to you.

[dodie]

Nindotah..... kung naako answering machine, I'll record myself... wahahaha!!!!

[kent666]

lol.. nice idea!

[fiero19]

waaaahhh murag akong away message... "Dont bother me... I'm meditating". lolz.

[yami]

3. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company,
I already sent the money. If you are my parents,
please send money. If you are my financial aid
institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If
you are my friends,you owe me money. If you are a
female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.

4. Hi. Now YOU say something.

6. Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are
you?

8. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is
his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and
I'll stick your message to myself with one of
these magnets.

10. This is not an answering machine-this is a
telepathic thought-recording device. After the
tone,think about your name, your number and your
reason for calling, and I'll think about
returning your call.

11. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding
someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if
I don't call back, it's you!!!!

13. If you are a burglar, then we're probably at
home cleaning our weapons right now and can't
come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't
home and it's safe to leave a message.


15. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't
pick up the phone right now, because we're doing
something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing
it up and down, and I like doing it left to
right... real slowly. So leave a message, and
when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get
back to you.

hahahaha!!!

[tahbiapo]

#9 igo ang telemarketer da hahahaha!

[sexyjelly]

11. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding
someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if
I don't call back, it's you!!!! grin

hahahaha... ggrabe ha.. hehehehe

[vladmire]

nindut ni dah, kung naa palang ko answering machine sa balay pilian nako ang messages kada adlaw

[lalee]

saonz man... di man uso dri pilipinas ang answering machine haha

[pink_baby_f]

nice one...