Memoirs of an Amnesiac

There has to be a better word to express what one feels during graduation day. It is not just the thought and the feeling when one dons a garment (that resembles that of the ones worn by the senators in an impeachment case), either in white or black ;and that hat that when worn, you no longer need to go to a salon for a hair spa (it comes with the steam inside it, woah! What a nice contraption!). Add to that the graduation march that even when I hear it every year, I never seem to get enough of it. Plus those tear-jerker graduation songs that often remind one that it is time to move on sans the classmates that one has been with for the past six or four years (depending on whether one has or has not repeated any level).

I have been in too many commencement rites my whole life (being one who practically spent almost 80% of one's life in school). Often, I find myself stumbling along the memory lane on those three graduation ceremonies I have ever been. (I hope to have the fourth one soon!) They evoke sad, nostalgic and often happy times.

During my graduation day in elementary, there was a heavy downpour. Not too many were able to witness me deliver my speech but nonetheless, those speakers who inspired me were there. And the three most important people in my life were there, too. In my high school graduation, it rained again but this time, I had not delivered any speeches. It was one of those difficult phases in my life because it was then that I realized I belonged to the school of hard knocks. Right then and there, success became a honey, too sweet for my tongue and yet I'm craving it. In college, I barely made it to my graduation day. I had chicken pox and was just days into the incubation period. So, imagine me marching with all those marks on my face and walking dizzily from the fever that came with it. ( I had all the pictures as a bitter-sweet reminder of such a phase). I could not miss my graduation. I thought that even when I would have to march on a wheel chair or with the intravenous liquid still attached to me, I would still march. For me, no other feeling in the world is far greater than the feeling of accomplishing something, of realizing that one has finally reached a pinnacle in one's existence and that another pinnacle needs to be traversed and explored. Graduation day was, is and will always be (for me) that one of the most memorable days in one's life.

Small wonder that many people would go through great heights just to march. This brings to mind a recent incident in a school here in Cebu that was reported to have refused a student's desire to join her graduation day all because she violated the rules of the school (for allegedly posting lewd pictures on Facebook).

Many argued that it is the student's right to march just as it is her right to be educated. Some pointed out that being a part of a school that adheres to certain rules of conduct and behavior (clearly stipulated in the school's handbook, which not everyone bothers to read, only I guess when cases are already filed), it is the student's duty to obey and submit. This incident and all the underlying arguments behind it are still debatable. I am in no point of arguing (for often my stand would be for the school and its ideals).

What I'm wondering about is what that student feels when she got to march today on her graduation day. Doe she feel dignified, proud to have accomplished something, or the other way around? I hope she gets something out of her experience.

Graduating is not just about accepting the diploma. It is a whole four, five or six years' worth of patience, perseverance and obedience --- those often-neglected virtues.

As for me, tomorrow, I will be speaking in front of a crowd of proud parents and students, all filled with elation for having witnessed the closing and starting of a new chapter in one's life.

My musings about graduation will remain as they are, ineffable, just as the commencement march is...