Best jokes ever..

[bizz_dakk]

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[bizz_dakk]

From FB:

Pulis: "Ugma sa alas 6 sa buntag bitayon naka"..

Priso: "Hahahahaha"

Pulis: "Ngano nikatawa man ka?"

Priso: "Alangan alas 8 naman ko tigmata." hahaha

orayt!

[bizz_dakk]

From FB:

Juan: Dok, Bakit pag umiinom ako ng Coke sumasakit sikmura ko, pero pag LIBRE hindi naman,

Doktor: Normal yan, Manipis Atay mo, pero MAKAPAL mukha mo,,

orayt!

[<SMILE>]

[IMG][/IMG]

[bizz_dakk]

During a Visa Interview:

Consul: "Name"

Applicant: "Abdul Rahul Rakan maam!"

Consul: "Age"!

Applicant: "25 maam!"

Consul: "S3x!"

Applicant: "Boys and Girls sometimes Camel,"

Consul: No! no! no! my dear your s3x really,,

Applicant: "Sorry mam no experience on DEER, but i will try..

Orayt!

[bizz_dakk]

Boy; hulog ka ba ng langit?
Girl: asus..saba diha! karaan na kau ng linyaha..
Boy: kay nalumping man gud imong nawong. haha..

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Sa airport canteen,nag-order usa ka Amerkano:
Kano: Miss, will you please give me one few two.
Tindera: What sir?
Kano: I said one few two.
Tindera: Oh, you want puto!
Kano: Yeah, that’s right. Is that how you pronounce it ?
Tindera: (Nagbagutbot… buang man ning Americanoha puto lang, gi-few two, few two pa, ako ni balusan), Okey sir, What color do you want? Few la or few ti?

orayt!

[bizz_dakk]

Sa Math Class
Teacher: kung naa koy 1 ka piraso nga karne ug tungaon nako, pila na ka piraso?
Juan: 2 mam!
Teacher: at kung tungaon pa nko preho?
Juan: 4 na mam!
Teacher: tungaon pjud nko?
Juan: 8 na mam!
Teacher:Tungaon pjud nko?
Juan: 16 na mam!
Teacher: 2ngaon pjud nko?
Juan:32 na mam!
Teacher: kung 2ngaon pjud?
Juan: 64! (suko na)
Teacher: ug tungaon pjud ug kduha?
Juan: Ipagaling na lang na mam ky maglisod nakog ihap...

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Boy: nganu mura man kag nahadlok?

Girl: hapit ko ma rape diha sa unahan, may gani naa koy kwarta.

Boy: unya imo na lang gihatag imung kwarta?

Girl: wala ui nag hotel nalang mi,, lain sad kaayo ug diha rami sa daplin moplastar.

orAyt!

[yhokz101]

GOLIAT: Goliat, kanang akong tatay sa player pa na sa basketball, mao nay kinadak-an og suweldo, dies pesos kada dribol.

GOLIAT: Dakoa og sweldo no?

TEBAN: Wala gyu’y nadawat bisa’g usa ka dako wala man pasahe.

GOLIAT: Butangeee.



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Simhot

GOLIAT: Noy Teban, kinsa ning babayhana ... simhota ang akong kamot.

TEBAN: bi. (simhot) ... Hmm. Si Lorelie.

GOLIAT: Sa pikas kamot, simhota og kinsa ning babayhana.

TEBAN: (simhot) ... Hmm si Josephine.

GOLIAT: (koot sa lubot) ... Kini. Simhota og kinsa ning babayhana?

TEBAN: (simhot). Hmmm ... bag-o ron da.

GOLIAT: Ngeeeeek.

[yhokz101]

[bizz_dakk]

Only Two Things Can Change a Woman’s Mood:
1. I Love You!
2. Less 50% Discount.,

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For Women who say:
“ALL MEN ARE THE SAME,”

Someone posed a question:
“Who told you to try ALL OF THEM?”