Best jokes ever..

[boi_bahaw]

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Dan was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business.
When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed to find a wife with whom to share his fortune.
One evening, at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away
"I may look like just an ordinary guy," he said to her, "but in just a few years, my father will die and I will inherit $200 million."
Impressed, the woman asked for his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.

[kenjisatto1982]

Dan was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business.
When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed to find a wife with whom to share his fortune.
One evening, at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away
"I may look like just an ordinary guy," he said to her, "but in just a few years, my father will die and I will inherit $200 million."
Impressed, the woman asked for his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.

d po to joke... story ng isang gold digger ata...

[paparoy]

SELOSONG BANA NANAWAG SA ASAWA.
Mr: Asa ka ron?
Mrs: Naa rko sa bay.
Mr: E on daw ang blender.
(gi-on ang blender: Rrrrrreeeeeeeee)
Mr: Aw abi ko nilaag ka.
(later nanawag napud ang bana)
Mr: Asa ka?
Mrs: Naa ra lagi ko sa bay.
Mr: E on kuno ang blender.
(gi-on ang blender: Rrrrrrreeeee)
Mr: Kana ba aron way duda.
(Niuli ang bana nga wa nagpahibalo. Nakit-an nya sa gwas ang anak)
Mr: Asa imo mama?
ANAK: Ambot asa to sya.
Gadaladala man tog BLENDER!

HAHAHAHA! tawa din pag may time..

[cerberus]

Titser: class, asa ang mas daghan tubig o yuta?

Student: yuta ma'am!

Titser: bugo ka! ka napulo nata cgeg balik2
ana nga leksyun sayop gihapon ka? Ang
Kalibutan nato 70% tubig ang 30% yuta!

Student: mas bugo ka ma'am, wa man gani ko kaligo
ganiha kay way agas, unya dghan na nuon ang
tubig? Tuay dghang yuta sa amu ma'am ai,

PAlubong ka?!!

[virginmay]

ang bata tumitig sa langit....

Pangit: Hoy bata! ba't ang sama mo tumingin?
Bata: Ikaw? eh ba't ang sama mo tingnan?

tuara,....

[centerpiece]

blessed are the crossed eyed for they can see god twice.....

[bravoONE]

Nahubog

BOY1: Pre! Nahubog ba ko gabii?
BOY2: Wala man pre! Igo ra nimo gihagis amu iring nya kalit nisyagit ug....

GO PIKACHU! THUNDER BOLT ATTACK!

Hubog pud ni si boy 2... Ilaga mn gud na si pikachu! Ahahahahahahahah

[vonscrups]

(Ang Bus nga gisakyan ni Juan gi hold-up)

Holdaper: Hold-up! Wala'y molihok! Ipataas ang kamot.

Juan: Nayabag na! Wala man kaha'y molihok? Unya ipataas diay ang kamot? pag-sure oi!

Holdaper: Bungol ka! Ingon ko ipataas ang kamot!
Ipagawas ang kwarta ug alahas!

Juan: Gibangkong na! Unsaon pagkuha sa mga alahas ug
kwarta kung ipataas ang kamot? Bogo gyud!

Holdaper: Hold-up gani hold-up! Samoka nimo oi!
Papusil ka?

Juan : Nahala pusila! Mananghid pa man diay? Ganiha hold-up karon mamusil na hinoon!
Asa may klaro ani? Naog nalang ko oi!

Holdaper: May'pa, gasamok-samok lang ka!

[alfalfa]

During cross examination...

ATTY: Kung tinuod nga gilugos ka aning akusado, ngano man nga mobalos ka ug kiyod inig kiyod niya?
BIKTIMA: Self defense Torni oi, self defense!!!

[woodpusher]

Naa koy naka dinner date...
naay kugmo duol sa iyang lips...giingnan na lang nako,..naay momho duol sa imong lips o..gitilapan niya ug nisulti...di man lagi momho, sud-an man lagi!..