Divorce, Legal Separation, Annulment: What is your stand?

[sinsiyo]

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kung naa plan nga mgdivorce then dili na lng engrande ang kasal...hehehe

[kiwiboy]

none... people should never forget the values that has been taught to us in the church...
trust in God at all times my people.. tell Him all your troubles for He is our refuge....
God answers we refuse to listenn....

[n`gel]

omg martyrdom ... no matter how many mistresses the husband has or had ... martyr lang gihapon because their marriage is binded by God and nobody can ever break its bind. And so what does nanay do? Clean the house, cook, tend to her children's needs, knit or crochet, watch soap opera and then sleep. She cannot go find herself happiness because she needs to set a good example to her children. And so, youngest daughter sees her nanay and says, 'when I grow up, I want to be just like my nanay" or painfully  lose respect for her nanay to be so totally 'gaga' over her tatay.

Please do not insist about martyrdom because we don't live panahon sa mga katsila. Women's rights and equality has had successfully been expressed and majorly recognized by society.

Kids? It is a problem and I agree with thinkrich. Our society has not cope up with reality just yet. Whilst here in the US, where I am and Streetcar is too, kids aren't affected by parents' divorce as much us our filipino kids. A child needs to have a mother figure and a father figure... this is what I think. He needs to grow up knowing his dad, spend time with him, sleep over for xmas, new years, thanksgivings, play baseball with him, go shopping unless the parent is mentally, physically or emotionally incapable of caring his children. There is great possibility for the child to grow up with separated parents healthily... or well at least a little healthily.

Open-mindedness.. that's the key. Kung dili gyud mada kinahanglan gyud mag separate, their obligation to their kids should remain a priority. Work things out, schedule visitations, agree on child support. Let whoever has left be a part of your child's life. They will understand if you talk to them whole-heartedly why mama and papa had to live separately.

[Gwynhuever]

ako after all is said and done...wa koy plano mag pa ka martyr for anyone...not even my own kids...kon di nako happy sa sitwasyon...good bye bunot...i only have one life....and i am not answerable to anybody regarding my decision how to live it....so in a nutshell...i am in favor for divorce....it goes without saying after ma exhaust na tanan venues of reconciliation of course kay i do not take my marriage vows lightly man sad....i am in favor for divorce aron naa laws maka legislate sa child support etc...kay kon dili ma legalize...mas samot ka gubot.....

it is easy to get on our high horses and say marriage is sacred...promises were made....God joined the couple together etc etc....but there are things that we can never fathom...ang couple ra jud nakabalo unsa ka impyerno staying in a loveless marriage....so go na dayon he he he

[Streetcar]

omg martyrdom ... no matter how many mistresses the husband has or had ... martyr lang gihapon because their marriage is binded by God and nobody can ever break its bind. And so what does nanay do? Clean the house, cook, tend to her children's needs, knit or crochet, watch soap opera and then sleep. She cannot go find herself happiness because she needs to set a good example to her children. And so, youngest daughter sees her nanay and says, 'when I grow up, I want to be just like my nanay" or painfully lose respect for her nanay to be so totally 'gaga' over her tatay.

Please do not insist about martyrdom because we don't live panahon sa mga katsila. Women's rights and equality has had successfully been expressed and majorly recognized by society.

Kids? It is a problem and I agree with thinkrich. Our society has not cope up with reality just yet. Whilst here in the US, where I am and Streetcar is too, kids aren't affected by parents' divorce as much us our filipino kids. A child needs to have a mother figure and a father figure... this is what I think. He needs to grow up knowing his dad, spend time with him, sleep over for xmas, new years, thanksgivings, play baseball with him, go shopping unless the parent is mentally, physically or emotionally incapable of caring his children. There is great possibility for the child to grow up with separated parents healthily... or well at least a little healthily.

Open-mindedness.. that's the key. Kung dili gyud mada kinahanglan gyud mag separate, their obligation to their kids should remain a priority. Work things out, schedule visitations, agree on child support. Let whoever has left be a part of your child's life. They will understand if you talk to them whole-heartedly why mama and papa had to live separately.

Agree ko ni N`'gel. Sa America if parents divorces, ang priority sa government mga bata. No deadbeat father or mother gets away from that responsibility. Kids Number 1. Mag divorce man mo you have to face up to those responsibilities of continously taking care of your children until they turn 18. Ask me, me and the father of my kid attended a mandatory class. I did not marry him at all but he is the father. He has 20% visitation right di man gani mabisita ang bata so i dont rely on him or anything at all when it comes to the kid. In my situation, ang father walay interes sa bata so its a different situation pero children here are the number 1 priority when parents divorce they have to take turns with visitation rights and arrangements who will have the kids every other weekend ba and make sure that the childrens needs are met. On top, you cannot take the kids miles away without the permission and approval from the other parent. If a parent do not help support their kids financially, the other parent can claim for child support or alimony. And if one parent defaults on that, he goes to jail. Cant run and can't hide situation they really enforce that here all for the benefit of the child or children. So if you are owing child support payments pa and then you get caught driving for some reason got stopped for violation ang imong record naa nay nakatatak nga wanted ka for failure to pay chiild support payments. They can revoke your driver's license and you could land in jail. So its very tough here. Although divorce is legally allowed, their number 1 priority is mga bata gyud. If both parents have issues with each other like they ended up in bad terms, some of these parents have the tendency to involve the kids with their tug-o-war games. this is where the law steps in. Both parents will be sent to mandatory classes and both of them will need to provide reports on their war progress. So when parents divorce, the law is designed to take care of the children and to enforce that responsibility from both parents.

[Shofu]

..as what my mom said "LOve is blind and marraige is the eye Opener"...My comment on the issue is simply leave than suffer and making the kids miserable pyschologically lisud but unsaun taman nga the greatest change that we cant control is "TIME"gone are those beliefs nga magpaka martyr kay basin unsa ika sulte sa uban maski nagpatay na..to hell wd them!! COMPROMISE IS A GOOD UMBRELLA BUT NEVER A GOOD ROOF.

[Shofu]

P.S. Streetcar & Angel faced...asa mu dapit dha sa america?

[n`gel]

@shofu: Am in Virginia.

And I agree, kung unhappy ang parents samot na nang grabe na kaayo'g friction ba, maka affect gyud sa mga bata and it's gonna mess them up more than if their parents don't live in the same roof but are still friends.

Tell you guys honestly, katong grabe na kaayo amo away sa ako ex-husband sa una, mag-sininggitay nami sa kwarto, one time my baby girl who hasn't turned 2 yet she was outside the bedroom, iya gyung gisirad-an ang door behind us. Niana gud ko, she didn't wanna hear mommy and daddy fighting that's why she closed the door on us. Then kabata pa anang edara grabe gyud.

[jugs_06]

martyr? what the?!

d na uso ang mgpaka martyr ron.. aw d man cguro matawag nga martyrdom if you never loved the person in the first place.. forced marriages deserve a separation, especially if you can't take being with the guy anymore.. get out from the marriage and file a divorce, that's the only solution..

[rey04]

bitaw! engrade2x daun buwag, hehehehe.....

uhmmmm. dili ko gusto naa divorced dire
gipanumpaan na gud na ninyo, sayang kaayo ang gasto sa kasal, engrande pa ra ba.
hehehe