5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
person who doesn't get it. --> hehehe. speaks to me...i wonder why
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
person who doesn't get it. --> hehehe. speaks to me...i wonder why
Round of golf..
A man staggered into a hospital with a concussion, multiple bruises, two
black eyes and a five-iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally,
the Doctor asked him, "What happened to you"
"Well, I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult
hole; we both sliced our balls into a cow pasture. We went to look for them
and while I was looking around, I noticed one of the cows had something
white at its rear end."
"I walked over, lifted its tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with
my wife's monogram on it - stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt."
"Still holding the cow's tail up, I yelled to my wife, "Hey, this looks like
yours!"
"I don't remember much after that . . . ."
Our New Supermarket...
A new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic water
mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the
sound of distant thunder and smell the scent of fresh rain.
When you approach the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and experience
the scent of fresh hay.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and
the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.
The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn.
I don't buy toilet paper there any more.
Judge's wish
In a traffic court, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer for a ticket (challan) given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honour that she was a schoolteacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case so she could get to the school on time.
A wild gleam came into the judge's eye. "You are a schoolteacher, eh?" he continued, "Madam, I shall realise my lifelong ambition. I've waited years to have a schoolteacher in this court. Sit down at that table and write `I will never jump a red light again' 500 times!"
Men strike back!
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably
never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand
closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at
the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's *** drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street
with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
a good one,
"I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always."
hehehe a bellly acher
he should have made his own sign para dili mabuking na under siya...![]()
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