Merged: Selos or Jealousy in Relationships

[lady_smarty]

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ok. naa ko question mga pipol!
how would you differentiate jealousy from insecurity then?

[[DSX]]

its a matter of semantics. as for me.. jealousy is a feeling that we can't control... what matters is how you react to that feeling. it can be both a good thing and a bad thing.

[SpW_Clear]

hmmm...

[sHe]

I dont think if your jealous it already means that you have no trust to your partner.....its just that you love him/her that much that you cant afford to lose him/her. It's a feeling which you cant control....no matter how hard you try to ignore.

[SpW_Clear]

but then why most of our partners can not understand it?

[giver_bert]

This is an important point. Feelings of jealousy always appear to stem from one's sense that something about their life is not secure... is uncertain or in danger. Although some might have objected to this particular point because they believe that insecurity is necessarily pejorative.. but it should not to be interpreted literally.. it could be that this lack of security is very well founded - that the partner is about to run off with 'the other woman'.

in some cases, the insecurity is not founded on realistic dangers to the relationship and solving those sorts of insecurities isn't easy, but until you do you'll continue to face those feelings. the jealous partner may wish to consider where her/his insecurities are coming from.

Since we tend to become more secure in relationships as they become more stable with time, you may find that time is your ally in dealing with jealousy.

It is important to distinguish jealousy from envy. To oversimplify, jealousy is angry, envy is wistful. Jealousy is destructive, envy rarely is... (just came accross this idea over the web)

[benz_jie2002]

jealous naa gyud na but don't make it too much..

[digitalsuperman]

yeah i agree...

too much of something is bad enough..

[SpW_Clear]

ya ryt... but how will you know it's too much? in my case i had the reason to be jealous but it came out that i'd just been to much, the reason for him to give up...

[mm]

jealousy is really difficult to control....
at first ok rah... ma-feel pa nmu ang love kun mag-selos but kanang murag sobra na kau bah to the point na mu-explode nka sa ka-over! kana... dli na ok. but cge lang ghapon... accept lang ghapon. kaw pa ang mag-sorry fer sumthing u didnt do.