inday jokes

[babypaupau]

---

share lng ko,pls share ur inday jokes.

para sa mga wala pa kaila ni inday


bio data ni inday (inday - ang sosyal na katulong)

Name: Inocencia Binayubay
Age: 18
Parents: Aling Seling and Mang Andoy
Siblings: Iying 13, Itoy 8, Iking 5
Educ: College - La Salle Zobel 2nd yr
Educ: HS - P. Gomez High School (Valedictorian, Best in English)
Educ: Elem - Sta. Monica Elem. School (Valedictorian, Best in Dancing)
Work Experience: 3 yrs, Household Service Manager - Mr. and Mrs.
Montemayor


------------------
hold up

Inday: I pity you for you have degraded your very own pride and
dignity by resorting to this despicable behavior just for wealth, and
I hope that one day you’ll realize that you should not use humans as
means of your ends. As what the great philosopher Kant uttered, “treat
a man as an end in itself.
Holdaper: Shut up! Coz if you don’t the bullet in this gun will rest
upon your empty head!
Inday: Oh eto na. Pamasahe ko nalang nga yan eh!!

[babypaupau]

Guess what? Those not-so stunning guys keeps on staring at my newly manicured nails while the copy-cat freaks envy my stylishly cut mane. Unfortunately after a great day at the spa, I have to step on this muddy and stinking place just to purchase some veggies!

- Si Inday, nakikipagchikahan sa tindera sa palengke.

----------------


Nanay: Day, ba’t ba ang tigas-tigas ng ulo mo?

Inday: Inay, intransigence is just normal for us juveniles.

Nanay: Day, anong nakain mo? I’m perturbed by your words.

Inday: Nay, ala namang gantihan…

– noong bata si Inday

------------------


Amo: Inday, ba’t sinisipon si Junior?

Inday: He came in direct contact from surfaces contaminated with rhinoviruses which entered the cells of the lining of his nasopharynx which in turn rapidly multiplied. Thus, giving him a viral infectious disease of the upper respiratory system called acute viral nasopharyngitis.

Amo: [nosebleed sabay nataranta] what??! tumawag ka ng ambulansya! bilis!

Inday: Hayy, you’re so ignorant. As if you have not been afflicted with the common cold in the course of your existence.

[boombox]

Beggar

AMO: inday,my pulubi s g8,paalicn mu nga..
INDAY: ryt away!
INDAY to BEGGAR: hey u putrid-smeling beggar w/ d diverse ambiance of scnted junk dt assails evrybody’s n0strils & carbon free lungs,pls go away n0w!
BEGGAR: wat?!hu do u think u r?!u pthetc trying hard nanny!how cud u,a s0cial climbr & vry low grade mammal,underestim8 a high-class beggar lyk me?!d hell w/ u!
INDAY: nk2sakit kna ah!mam oh,ayaw umalis oh..hehe!

Inday caregiver

Isang araw, nagulat ang amo dahil bumalik ang naglayas na si Inday.
AMO: Inday! Bumalik ka rin! Bakit?
INDAY: I care about my job, Sir. I care about you!


Ayaw bumula

Juan: Kainis na shampoo ‘to! Ayaw bumula!
Inday: Paano po bubula yan hndi nman basa buhok nyo?!
Juan: Haller! For dry hair toh! Dry hair!!! Nag-iisip ka ba Inday?


Inday na walang Ingles

Amo: Mula ngayn, wlang mgssalita ng ingles. Ang sinumang magpadugo ng utAk ko at sa mga anak ko,palalayasin sa pmmahay na’to! Klaro b?
Inday:Ang mga nmutawi sa inyong mga labi ay mtaman ko pong iiimbak sa sulok ng akng balintataw,sa kaibuturan ng akng puso, gugunamgunamin, aariing salik ng aba at payak kong kabatiran.Tatalikdn ang matayog at palalong bnyagang wka, mnapay kkalingain,bibgkasn at sakdal timyas na sasambitin ng aking sangkalooban.=)


Inday to Jennylyn Mercado

Its crtainly aceptble 2 mke mstakes & learn frm dem. just mke sure dat u do learn– word of advce ni Inday sa buntis na kumareng c Jennylyn Mercado


Tumawag si Pacquiao


(Pacquiao’s calling)
Inday: Gunaydin! (Good morning in Turkish)
Pacquiao: Hilow! Is Mr. Montinigru ober dir? I want to jas know ip can he be here to catch me in di ring por di fight? I can be winning. Im not to be in di lose.
Inday: ha? (nosebleed)
-na knockout sa Inglis ni Manny! Sa wakas natalo rin si Inday.


Inday Belo


Amo 1: Inday ano gamit mo sa katawan? Ang kinis mo kasi eh.
Amo 2: Siguro gumagamit ka ng papaya…
Ama 1: Baka naman kalamansi?
Inday: NO! …. ONLY BELO TOUCHES MY SKIN, WHO TOUCHES YOURS?
Amo 1 and 2: LUPET MO INDAY!!!

[ix-888]

[gugut]

Inday...


amo:Inday isulod palihog ang comforter sa kwarto!

inday:ugma o karon sir?

amo:karon!

inday:unsang orasa sir?alas 9,10,11,12 o sa hapon alas 3,4,5 o sa gabii sir 6,7,8?

amo: karon na!buntag alas 7!!!

inday:asa ibutang?sa sawg o sa kama?

amo: sa kama inday!!!

inday:pil-on o bukharon?

amo:inday!!bukhara inday!!!mahapak tika ron!!!

inday:asa man ko hapakon sir?sa ulo,sa lawas,sa kamot o sa tiil?

amo:sa imo'ng baba inday!!

inday:unsa man e hapak nimo sir?bakus,kahoy, o tubo?

amo: kining akong glingkoran!pilosopo kaau ka!!

inday:aw, ok sir,kusgon o hinayon sir?

amo: kusgon!!hala layas na dire!!

inday:oi, karon o ugma?

amo: karon na!!!

inday: ihatud?dili?

amo: dili!!

inday:unya ang separation pay nako sir?mahatag man kaha?

amo: hatagan tika inday!!

inday:cheki o cash?

amo:cash!!

inday: puro sinsilyo o puro tibuok?


bunalan ug bangku sa amo...nakuyapan intawn c inday...

padayonon...

[Bustillo_28]

Inday has been raped.....

Inday: Mam, gilugos ko ni sir...
Amo: Unya, wala diay ka muriklamo?
Inday: Meriklamo ko man uy...
Amo: Niunsa man ka pagriklamo?
Inday: Akong giingnan sir, "Sir gakus ra diay? Wala diay halok?".