This one is the original Desiderata:

Desiderata
By Max Ehrman
Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all people.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;and listen to all
even to the dull and ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive people, they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself to others you will become vain and bitter;
there will always be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery.
But let not this blind you to the virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Be yourself especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have the right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.


This one is a funny Desiderata:

Undesiderata

Go placidly amid the noise & haste, but better yet,
avoid the noise and haste altogether. Be on good terms
with all persons as far as possible; especially with shopkeepers.
Speak the truth plainly & clearly; listen to others, even the dull and
ignorant, until you are certain they are utterly useless.
When you are not among men of reason, it is better to run than argue.
Make use of loud & aggressive persons like salesmen, and use them to
broadcast your radical views.
If you compare yourself to others,
you may become vain & bitter; for always there
will be greater & lesser persons than yourself.
This is a good thing; vanity makes you more interesting to look at,
and bitterness makes you more practical and realistic.
Keep a strong interest in your own career, however
humble; but if you don't enjoy humility for its own sake,
learn to exercise yourself in greater spheres of action.
Once you know something, it is yours forever;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
You always have to take care of wealth; knowledge takes care of you.
Exercise caution in you business affairs; for the world is full of people
who must turn a profit to survive. Many persons strive for high ideals;
some thrive, and some starve. There is no good reason to starve. Most
people throw away treasures. Many useful & interesting items can be had for
half price, if you are willing to buy them used.
Be yourself. Especially, do not deny yourself pleasure for fear of social
stigma. Indulge yourself in private. If you love yourself shamelessly,
others will love you.
Resist aging and death with every resource available to you. Nurture
skills of self-defense. Learn how to survive under difficult conditions;
this may shield you in sudden misfortune. Distinguish between illusion and
reality, between emotion and fact. Avoid making important decisions on too little sleep.
Kick your own ass. The universe neither cares about you nor recognizes any
obligation to you. It is fixed and blind, a mad robot programmed to kill.
You are free and seeing; you must outwit it at every poor turn.
Whatever your labors & aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, you
must create your own sanity, prosperity, and peace.
The world is so gorgeous it hurts. Be careful. Strive to be happy.

-found on a plaque attached to a communications satellite; dated 2012