I read through all of the comments here. Amazing ang support. na feel pud nako imo na feel TS. Except unlike you, I am a bad person. Akong gi talikdan akong kids, wife. parents, relatives, brothers and sisters, (it's my fault, btw). I am literally alone with superficial friends. I am drowning in debt and I still support my kids financially, I am in my early 30s with no career, no investments, no savings and no future. I haven't gone to church for the longest time and I feel like I am such a waste of human space. I can't go back anymore because of my pride and I really don't want to patch things up with my wife. So here I am, akong gi pa ibabaw akong pride, mahay mahay ang agi. I am the perfect example of who not be. Ungrateful, useless, miserable. Sometimes, I think I might be better off dead, and probably the lot of you here would agree with me after reading as to what kind of person I am. I am telling you this because there is so much to live for and tomorrow is always an opportunity to change. while I admit that my past is as dark as the void that is my soul, I know I can still turn things around. Maybe not sa akong relationships with my past, but in fixing myself. I have made mistakes then I became (and still am) depressed and it constantly breaks me and tears me down. Di ka nagiisa, dont nurture the feeling. Always create small wins (look at life and be happy about the small things just like how you would with big things). Update on my battle with depression, no cash to have myself checked. Constantly found at drinking places, tonyos, pipeline.. etc. kung asa ang botelya, didto ta.. smoking myself to death (1 stick = -1 day sa life, kind of logic) got a part time job to be productive. 3 hours a day 4 days a week. my pay there less than 3k lang kada buwan. lol. so i work about 12-14 hours a day. lisod man sad gud mamingaw. daghan kag ma hunahunaan nga di mao.. gamay nalang kulang. ok raman sad wa man say mangita. got myself insured pud para sako mga kiddies. hahaha.. lisod kaayo sa? kay daghan taw gnahan mu tabang,, daghan kunuhay naa para nimo.. but I still feel alone, and I feel so bad.. kana ganing ma ikog ka para sa mga taw nga ma associate nimo, feeling nako failure kaayo ko. AS IN. its all my fault man sad so ako ni lamyon ako kahimtang.. ok lang. rak en roll pa rin. Wish you all the best in your personal battles. I know that I am the last guy on your list kay tungod sa akong past, a stranger in a forum, you might not even consider it, but if you want to, we can talk. Who knows, I might be the one needing it. That might be your calling. hahaha. sorry nakisakay ko sa imo thread. haha