LOVE PROBLEMS ( post em all here ) READ FIRST POST...

[Opyong]

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pag date ninyo i semi-rape para ganahan hehe

[potterboy]

aysus, highshool pa diay ka dong? huwat inig abot nimo sa college kay diba mosunggo ka sa mga nagbaha nga babaye. mga mamords na. ayaw sa highschool, init pa kaau na, basin nuon ug ma-papa ka ug sayo. hehehehe.

samot na ug naa naka trabaho, di lang kay mosunggo ka sa imong lineup, kalibanga gyud ka sa pagka abunda sa mga ebyangz. ayaw pagdali basin maumod nuon ka sa di mao na, ka-igit gyud ka.

mas maau dong, antosa na imong nagkanoos nga agib, agib rana lagi. na misinterpret ra na nimo nga gugma. hew hew hew! ari college kay kaingon gyud kag mama.

tuo lang dong. yuna ra, naa ba na ate imong naibgan? PM lang kung naay detalye, basin mausab pa akong mga tambag nimo dri ug matudloan tika ug maka-langkat ug strap nga tactics. wehehehehe.

[InChaos]

mga bros ug mga sis.. thank you jud kaayo sa inyong mga insites about my situation and giving it attention.

honestly and dili lang jud panghambog, i am more capable financialy compared sa guy. and as what we talked about ingon man sya na muhatag raman daw ang guy ug "naa" ikahatag. thats how she told me about that. pero sakto mo. i dont understand why wala sya makigbuwag or unsay rason wa niya buwagi na wala man gni nya giminyuan? ako pud gusto ko mahibaw ani. gusto ko na ma settle nya iya sitwasyon aron di na kaayo samok sa amo relasyon kaayo. pero insaun man ni nako ug ingon ug tarong, na last time nag talk mi about ani na to settle her relationship, nihilak man ni sya,nahadlok, nahisubo na nag ingon nako na lain daw ko ug tono pagkasulti kay mura rag niingon na ko na muatras na ko? at that time niingon jud sya na friends nalang mi and nagbuwag jud mi for just about 2hours. kay after ato ni txt man sya na she wants to met with me. and that was about 1am na sa kadlawon. even if she said na undangon nalang, sya rapud nibalik.
she told me once na dakung sayop ang pagpili nya sa guy. niingon pud sya na 1 reason why di na sya ganahan sa guy kay nigawas naman iya tinuod batasan. and that was before pa daw sya na mabdos.nisamot daw pagkamabdos na hinuon nya.
im thinking na 1 reason why wala sya makigbuwag officially bisan wa na sila klaro,di sila minyo, is because something sa family side na agreement which is something i wanna know but i just dont know how to ask na dili mulabas na ma offend or malain ako lady ba. usa sad nag likay sa chismis.
i may be ready to let her go for now if its for the best so she can settle her things,bahalag sakit.but until i have the "right" words to say, and enough courage to say it to her... i wont be able to do it.....again

[monrose29]

kaya na nmo bro. it will pass away.. kaysa imong ng dala2x-on nag problema..... may ng usa ra ang sakit inig ka human wa na dayon...

[angelfyre]

@InChaos, practically your lady love is thinking about herself, her baby's well-being and that is not B-S.

It's not clear in your post that you have the means to support her and her child or at least, help her to be self-reliant. Do you?

i sed its BS bec she cant make up her mind. if well being jd sa iyang anak iya ghunahuna, e d lubos-lubusin nlng niya, pakasal nlng ta sya sa laki even if she doesnt love him anymore/d na cla magkasabot. shes thinking abt herself <---dis statement of urs, i agree.

i think ur in the right track InChaos

[jugs_06]

hey man ayaw gub a ila ralationship. maybe for now and girl suko lang sa guy. we never know if what jud status ila relationship and what happened before. so if i were u.... back off para lang sa baby. wait until magbuwag sila formally.

@inchaos:

ebyangz summarized it in just a few word..

@InChaos: sori but i think ur gf is sigurista. why dli man sya makigbuwag sa father sa baby? dli man kaha cla magkasinabot, dli pd niya love? hadlok sya d suportahan? kanang reason nga to stay together for the sake of the baby is a lot of BS. either that, or sadista lang jd sya, ganahan sya tortureron iyang kaugalingon. the prob lies wid ur gf. pagbuwag sa mo, let her settle her affairs first. i think shes confused.

...and i totally agree with angelfyre.. if she really don't love the father of her baby, she wouldn't find excuses or any reason to be with that guy again, not even a slightest chance.. going back to him is no gurantee that he's gonna be there financially, emotionally, and physically, right? from the way i read your problem, YOU ARE financially capable of taking care of her baby.. does that mean you are also ready to be the father of her child? i do hope you see the difference here..

also, do understand that women are always different and i have to stress that out.. some women can be totally independent and some are the complete opposite.. your girl might be one of those women who can't see herself taking care of her baby alone.. hence, she finds options as to how her baby could be in good hands (in this situation, your girl is opting to be with the father)..

and so, the very best thing to do right at this point is to back off and reflect on yourself.. it's difficult to go deep into your emotions and reflect when you're still very much involved in that situation.. and yup, you want me to be straightforward? tell you what, don't complicate things further when it's already complicated to begin with..

goodluck..

[InChaos]

what complicates if magbuwag mi kay we are just working at the same office man gud, so lisod basta na putlon ang amo attachment kay we see each other 8hrs a day for 6 days man huhuhuu...

btaw guys i knw most suggestion kay to back off sa relationship. but is there a way to pursuade her to break off with him if tinuod na di na jud nya love? or maybe find out the reasons why man jud/"really" the reason na wa man nya pakasli ang guy pero wa man nya gi end ila relationship? and some other related questions?

[diem]

@angelfyre, always in these cases and affairs of the heart, I take the side of the lady's defense in fairness.

@InChaos, thank you for answering my question. It clarifies some things for me and for others. Here are some more questions that I would like for you to clarify if you would be so kind....

patabang lang ko unsa inyo ma suggest ani ako gubot na sitwasyon nasudlan. im inlove sa usa ka girl with a 4-month old baby for about two months already now.

So you're saying that you've been in a relationship with the young lady for just two months? Then please answer me this, what is with the rush?

Good relationships, like all things, take time don't you agree? Why are you being impatient and (it just appears to me, and I use the following word lightly) "pushing" the lady to make a choice between you and the father of her baby?

I feel if you really love her, you would be generous to give her time to think things through, space to breathe and smile. Because she definitely needs to smile. All I hear from you about her is that she's always crying. Maybe right now is a tender time for her sensibilities, she doesn't feel confident about making choices right now. The lady's been through a lot, she just gave birth (her baby's four months old you say.. so that means the birth was just relatively recent). She has a lot on her mind and heart right now and taking care of an infant during its delicate first year of life on top of that.

I feel if you really love her, you would be generous to give her support, not just financial~ I mean emotional support. Be a true friend, someone.. A MAN she could lean on and depend on. Have you tried being a young single mother? Hell its apparently not easy, it can be pretty confusing and you're not making it any easier for her.

And talking about being more financially able than her baby's father~ Does this mean you are planning to marry her? Have you proposed within the two months you are in love with her? Hey it's love after all but that just doesn't seem too plausible.

@InChaos, so what's the deal bro? Why are you rushing things with her?

Hoping for your kind consideration.

[InChaos]

@diem : bay, thank you jud kaayo sa imo mga posts.it really helps me to think about things.
now to try and answer imo queries, actually wa man ko magdali sa relationship namo.i know sad na relationships just dont build complete for just 2 months or something.it takes time. it just happened man gud na at one time na naglalis mi, nao open ni nako na issue, about settling her relationship sa guy. and she was sad when i said it kay lagi it kinda like im saying i wana leave the relationship behind. it was that time na i could see sa iya facial expression and tone na she needed me but also was worried sa akoa coz i was thinking about that thing. thats why even if sya niingon ato na time na friends nalang mi, pag ask nya about 1am na she wanted to see me niadto jud ko nya.

i dont want to leave her. whatever hell she had or facing, i dont want to add up to it. eversince that day, im always tring to make her smile everytime magkita mi. im afraid to hurt her again. i dont wana see that look in her face again. it was just so painful and confusing especially tong niingon sya na nisaad sya sa iya self na di na unta sya mag uyab2 kay di sya guto masakitan...nasakitan jud sya......

[diem]

@InChaos, ^^Let me first say that I sincerely admire your character and your efforts for the woman you care for.

Thank so much again you again bro for taking the time and effort for the clarifications. Kung ining ana lang bro, huwag ka magu-ol kaayo. Please let the relationship take its natural course-- provide it time and room to grow and develop. Two months pa man and often as sure personality bumps come along the way.

As you give her understanding, time and space, please be kind to yourself too. As you make her smile and forget her troubles, please don't trouble yourself to the point of personal discomfort. I personally feel you're taking things way too seriously and being a bit too hard on yourself. Ease up a bit. It's also about your happiness and well-being too as much as it is hers.

Wishing you all the best in love and life! :mrgreen: