He's my best friend... but then he loves me

[ulyssa_marie]

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OT: TS kaila mo ni Ulysses? relative mo?

OT: ulysses kinsa? My dad's name is Ulysses And he named me Ulyssa.

[reigel99]

^^^ I'm reigel

[ulyssa_marie]

i've been avoiding him most of the times na jud. I only talk to him like once a week or even once in 2 weeks sometimes. naka feel sad niya na murag nag palayo sad ko niya.

I can also sense his efforts to being just 'best friends' again, coz he'd talk to me about random stuff, etc. But every now and then, mu show nasad iyang affection and i would just ignore it. As if it didnt happen, or di ko mu tingog.

Now and then, murag samukan ko niya coz he wants to me to be as open as i was before. But i only talk to him about general stuff instead of my problems. and he has this sad face.

I mentioned in the thread na mejo [I]loner/I] ko.. so its really hard to see a friend like that go. In the end, it's like i'm at fault.
many of the people ive consulted also tell me "maybe you led him on, or you made him think he had a chance." -just like a few of the replies earlier to this post. Pareho sad inyu mga advices. haha

But i can honestly say that i did nothing to lead him on.. atleast nothing in my point of view. If treating him like a sibling was a "lead on" , then perhaps im at fault.

in the end, i'm the bad guy?

[THE KID]

..............................

[aKaThIsIa]

pareha2x ta ug situation but im not in a relationship at the moment..It can't be avoided to not feel guilty or sorry for our guy best friend. Usahay I just tell to myself na mas mahurt siya kung akong pugson akong self ma inlove niya..Bisan dili siya musulti noh, I know deep inside hurt siya when I talk about a guy I like or if naa koi suitor..But at present, friends gihapon mi. I know someday, he'll find a girl who will love him and he will love in return..Just think about that, too. ^_^

[jonz]

kana imong amigo na inlove na nimo na debelop na sa sige ninu kuyog.... perhaps wt u can do is find a girl for her.. ipa ila2x.. para dili ma disturbo imong gugma sa imong uyab.. sigurado mn kha ka nga bestfriend lang imong pag tanaw sa iyaha?........kung naa ky duda klaroha sa imong gbati... para dili ka mg basol

[reigel99]

....in the end, i'm the bad guy?

ngano sa amo man ka mangutana ana? as if kaila me nimo

bitaw, don't worry of what others think about you.
why do you let other peoples opinions affect you so negatively?
thoughts are harmless -they can only hurt you if you let them.

you're just doing what's best. hurting a guy by saying "no" is not a bad thing.
kay kung bad pa na, daghan nay napreso

yaw kabalaka ana niya, makarecover ra to...
-nakarecover man gani ko

[ulyssa_marie]

i actually dont let other's opinions bother me negatively. I try to take it positively and put it into practice if it benefits me.

What i mean by 'bad guy', is in the situation, i'm the one who's the cause of it all. Or atleast, i'm the catalyst. I don't want to be the 'bad guy' here, which is why i'm trying to get opinions on how to handle the situation at best with minimizing pain for him, and trouble for me.

Im sure that there is no other alternative that will NOT hurt him, since he has chosen his actions, he should face what's to come after. but i'd want to minimize the pain as much as i can as to not traumatize him or be some kind of "bad memory" which he will tell his future kids one day. haha.

I'm just trying to get the best alternative solution here..

[ulyssa_marie]

kana imong amigo na inlove na nimo na debelop na sa sige ninu kuyog.... perhaps wt u can do is find a girl for her.. ipa ila2x.. para dili ma disturbo imong gugma sa imong uyab.. sigurado mn kha ka nga bestfriend lang imong pag tanaw sa iyaha?........kung naa ky duda klaroha sa imong gbati... para dili ka mg basol

uu, sure nako that i see him as a sibling and friend only. It feels like incest when i think about me having feelings for him.. it feels wrong jud.

I actually am encouraging him to find girls. actually, he's taking the initiative to find girls himself, which im glad to hear. But when he comes to me to talk about them, murag nag expect siya na muselos ko or something. But i show that im excited and happy for him and actually tell him "go for it! that's great!" , mu ingun sya dayun "nah.. " . nya mu guba nasad iyang nawng. i know he wants me to feel jealous, but i CANT! i can't find it in myeslf to feel jealous at all since im happy that my brother/friend is finally getting over me.

And it makes me feel bad na sometimes, iyang basis sa babae kay ako. Like she would have a similar attitude to me, or something similar jud. i want him to make decisions without putting me in it. it makes me feel even guiltier than ever when i know that nag lisod sya because of my existence.

if that's the case, maybe it was best if we didnt become friends in the first place.

[jinkazama92]

Do you love him?