MY NAME IS ELVISHTATTOO. I WILL DIE AT 37
MY COUSIN HAS JUST DIED. HE HAD TUBERCULOSIS, WHICH COMPLICATED HIS HEALTH SCARE. HE WAS DIAGNOSED TO BE HIV POSITIVE A FEW YEARS BACK.
BUT I’M NOT WRITING ABOUT THAT. I WAS NOT TORMENTED WITH THE LOSS. HE WAS NOT CLOSE A COUSIN TO ME THOUGH HE WENT TO THE SAME HIGH SCHOOL WITH MY OLDER SISTERS.
THIS IS ALL ABOUT DYING.
WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, I HAD A VISION THAT I WILL DIE WHEN I AM 37 YEARS OLD. I DON’T RECALL
I have been contemplating about leaving my job. I had enough. I can bear the long nights and the bad calls. I just can't manage the anxiety, social conflict causes me. There is just something about some people that does not contribute to my well being. Still here are the things that I will miss when I quit this job...
* Breakfasts @ I.T - strolling along IT park with people who laugh at work's challenges has always been good for me. At least in the morning.
Today is my 28th birthday.
I am at work when the clock struck 12 midnight.
I got warm wishes but I felt cold.
It could have been warmer under the blanket with PaO and my husband, Franklin.
It is sad and happy as I turn a year older.
There's a lot of reasons to celebrate.
My friends who remember and my family who never forgets.
I have never felt smarter in all my years.
It seems that I have become a different individual all of a sudden.
I want to feel sick in the morning.
I want to feel heavy with you growing.
I want the pain when I deliver.
I want to be a mother.
I want to hear you breathing.
I want to see you crying.
I want to grasp your innocence.
I want to be a mother.
I want to give you all vanity.
I want to show you things of beauty.
I want to pamper you forever.
I want to be a mother.
I want to wake up at dawn,
I want to stare
I have been here before.
This feeling is so familiar.
The thoughts are all so beautiful.
I truly have been here before.
I look at you from a distance.
Still I can't look into your eyes.
There is magic in your stare that I can't overcome.
You meet my wit with your charm.
Your presence stun me.
The thought of you near me makes me clinch.
I do not know if I am in pain.
Your aura drains the best word out me.